Pants

I've been reporting on the sad state of affairs over at Banana Republic for years now. Their two standard lines, the Dawson and Gavin, are, in my opinion, not well-cut trousers. However, you could at least say they are reasonable. Sometimes BR has special fits which are often absurd.

Friend and fellow pants connoisseur, Joe Dude, tried on the "Modern Fit" over the weekend and was deeply displeased - who can blame him? Just what about these pants are modern? The crotch-area is completely too big - it almost looks like he has two lower abdominal/pelvic regions. Also, the break is completely unacceptable.

Here is a remodeling that shows how these pants might be improved. Some of the width needs to be taken off, the break needs to be fixed, and for the love of good, the waist/crotch area needs to be streamlined.

Food

I was graciously invited to a Thanksgiving dinner at my friend's apartment. This was my first Thanksgiving in New York and the meal was delicious. Apparently the turkey had been slaughtered just a few days prior.

On friday I took the MetroNorth Harlem Line train to White Plains, New York, where a certain friend of mine picked me up. We then went to Candlestick Inn, a famous Westchester wing place. The wings were awesome!

We then spent much of the day exploring Westchester, and I saw many many towns. For dinner we went to Gino's in Bronxville. This pizza was very good.



Yeah, this really weird person insisted on me taking his picture at Gino's. What is up with those glasses?






On Saturday night I went to the original Patsy's on 1st Ave near 117th Street. It was quite a good pizza, and only $1.75 a slice!



After eating 4 slices of pizza I generally enjoy eating the chicken strip basket at Popeye's, so eat it I did. Listen to this, though: the Popeye's associate asked me what kind of sauce I wanted and I asked if I could have a side of gravy, and she said "NO." So I, in turn, said "Excuse me, but this is not the service I have come to expect from Popeye's. Please give me the damned gravy!" Actually, this is what I said: "Oh, oh, um, ok, I'll have honey mustard. Thank you."

Closed

This blogsite is CLOSED today for major pants shopping.

Happy Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving. I have a gift for you. I am going to let you know what I had for dinner last night. I will show pictures of my meal. Enjoy this special present!

Appetizer 1: The Crack Pie at Momofuku Milk Bar & Bakery.







Appetizer 2: Pork buns from Momofuku Milk Bar & Bakery.






Entree: 2 slices of pizza from Artichoke Basille, one Sicilian (pictured) and one round (uh, not pictured).





Dessert: Pumpkin Blondie from Momofuku Milk Bar & Bakery.

Money Means Options

I recently came into possession of about $4,000, through means I do not care to discuss on this blog (I did NOT rob a bank, although I have been contemplating doing that for quite a while, and when I do, hopefully I will acquire more than 4k).

Anyway, here are some things I'm thinking about doing with my funds...

Pay off a large portion of my credit card debt. Clearly, this goes against everything my country stands for. Next!


Buy a plane ticket to some exotic location and go on adventures, living off my wits and sheer physical prowess. This is a highly favored option.

Burn it. Granted, if I want to go for the dramatic effect seen here -- and of course I do -- I might have to create a few mock dollar bills to have a large enough pile of money, but I'm really not doing much this weekend so it's fine.

Anyway, I guess what I am saying is this: I have two very strong tendencies within myself. One is to be responsible, secure a relatively comfortable and safe life for myself and hopefully a future family. Two is to forsake all of this middle-class suburban American dream stuff and just go on adventures and live a more authentic life. And coming in a close third is imitating the Joker, as played by Heath Ledger.

THE END.

Movie Stuff

The Good, The Bad and the Ugly is arguably the coolest western ever made. The photography, accompanied by Morricone's score, is amazing.




















Anyway, I just learned about a Korean film called The Good, The Bad and the Weird, which seems to be some sort of pastiche or whatnot. Looks quite cool, and has some really cool posters, and I LOVE cool movie posters.




















"One Map. Three villains. Winner takes all."


Does this image remind you of the one from Good, Bad and Ugly above?

Josh's Crazy Fun Games

Hello, and welcome to Josh's Crazy Fun Games. Here is an all-time classic -- it's called Go To the Doctor and the Bakery as Fast as You Can So You Can Get Back to Work Quickly.

Today I had to go to the doctor because when I went last week and had some blood taken, there was too much calcium so they needed to re-check. Well, I didn't realize it until today, but my doctor's office is one block away from Magnolia bakery! Therefore I decided to go there after my appointment. I got a slice of Snickers icebox cake and also an order of banana pudding and ate these items as quickly as I could in the cab. The driver was very upset as I was getting crumbs e-v-e-r-y-w-h-e-r-e but I just yelled out, "faster, my good man!"

It was quite an adventure. Thank you.

The banana pudding. Delicious.









The Snickers icebox cake. Also delicious.









Me: Faster, my good man!
Driver: I can't go any faster!
Me: Fine, but make it snappy!