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Monday, April 6, 2015

The Adventures of Butter Bastard

Butter Bastard is my name.  Ever since I was a lad all I've cared about is eating delicious foods, eating them until I feel sick.  Once I become full, I proceed to walk around and do jumping jacks until there's room in my stomach, and then I eat again until I feel sick.  What other purpose can there be in life?

Yesterday, Sunday, April 5, it was.  A nice day.  In the clouds and with the wind blowing slightly chilly, but in the sun and without the wind pleasant.  I had plans to go to Streetbird, Marcus "the scarf" Samuelson's newest rotisserie chicken joint in "Harlem"  (it's on Frederick Douglass and 116, so nominally Harlem).  It was mid-afternoon and we would dine at 7pm, and I was hungry.  I fed at Black Seed Bagel on Elizabeth Street.  A plain bagel with egg, bacon and cheddar was what I ordered.  It cost a ridiculous $9.  It was goodish but any bagel sandwich which cost $3 would have been as good.

I'm tired of writing this.