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Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Adventures in Mallomars

Graham cracker cookie.  Marshmallow fluff.  Chocolate coating.  So simple yet so delicious.  Such a treat makes one believe in a higher power; makes one believe this is not just an accident, that the Earth is not just a random rock spinning around a fiery orifice in empty, black nothingness; in short, Mallomars make one glad to be alive.

As discussed extensively in these chronicles, Bouchon Bakery has been making their very own Mallomars.  They are larger than the ones you might find at your local grocery store, and they are coated in a rich, velvety milk chocolate, rather than the standard dark chocolate.  Furthermore, the Bouchon Mallomars are sprinkled with chocolate crunchies.

The first time I attempted to procure the Bouchon Pleasures on a Saturday morning a few weeks ago, the Bakery agent had to call down to a mysterious location and then go and retrieve a tray.  Last Friday when I went I was flatly told they didn't have any.  Today, I returned and was told the same thing: they didn't have any.  I screamed in anger and then hurled an elderly woman over the third floor precipice which drops to the lobby.  She succumbed to her injuries and I later found out she was actually my long-lost grandmother who disappeared before I was born in search of the perfect grilled cheese sandwich.

At any rate, Bouchon continues to claim they will still be producing Mallomars.  I will return soon and report back.