"The finest food and pants blog on the web."

Sunday, June 2, 2019

F' It

The summer is beginning, so shouldn't we all be happy?  I'm sitting at home, thinking.  I like my job, but in some ways I don't, but does it matter?  My wife is mad at me, but she says she isn't, but she really is, or is she?  Oh what the hell!?  I'm going on an adventure!  I ride the subway deep into Brooklyn, past the godforsaken pretend people, to where real people live.  I enter a Chinese noodle parlour and order rice noodles with minced pork and chile oil.  As I wait, the phone rings and one of the store owners picks up.  "Hey!  Can I get an order of chicken with baby corn?"  Really?  This is a real Chinese noodle parlour, not take-out American Chinese.  No they don't have chicken with baby corns, or General Tso's, you idiot!  My noodles come, filled with scallion and cilantro, and the noodles are good!  I walk back to the subway and stop at a cannoli joint.  I get a pistachio cannoli and it's filled to order, and I eat it as I wait for the subway to come and return me to my groundless existence in Manhattan.  THE END.

Mama's Noodle House, Bensonhurst Brooklyn
Cannoli Plus, Bensonhurst Brooklyn