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Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Pittsburgh Adventures

Oh jesus the adventure was calling.  I felt it inside, the spams of adventure, like a fevered dog waiting to go outside, the adventure was just spasming everywhere.  I was on my yearly trip to Pittsburgh, and I couldn't take it any longer.  Adventure: I demand it!  My old friend and adventure partner picked me up and we journeyed to the Galleria, a trendy, upscale center of commerce in the chic South Hills district.  There are countless choices in the Galleria, and my friend and I settled on BRGR, Pittsburgh’s newest premiere burger spot, which features grass-fed beef, your choice of bun, gourmet condiments, all in a lively, trendy atmosphere.  Patrons were wearing their finest Steelers sweatshirts, and the jeans, my god, let me tell you about the jeans.  They were comfort fit with elastic waistbands, stonewashed, pleated, with a nice, tapered leg.  The shoes: some of the finest Payless sneakers money can buy.  I ordered my grass-fed patty on a brioche bun with white cheddar, caramelized onions, and mustard aioli.  There were many craft beers to choose from, and I decided to go with Rolling Rock, a small local brewery that does a nice pale ale.  There was a pretend fire on an LCD screen roaring in the background, and I regaled my friend with tales of escape and revenge as we dined.  Adventure!