Pant Rippage Support Group

Yesterday was probably the hardest day of my life. The type of pant rippage I experienced was embarrassing and hurtful. Yet I learned something important: even a pants expert such as myself is fallible. Yes, I admit it, I make pant mistakes.

Another shot of the catastrophe

Yesterday showed me the truly horrifying and psychologically devastating consequences of having your pants rip in public. In particular, the walk home from work on the mean streets of New York was no picnic. I was laughed at and physically assaulted.

There is one good thing that will come out of yesterday's experience: I've decided to start a Pant Rippage Support Group. We will have our first meeting at Temple Beth Shalom, on 2348 Street. All are welcome.

"Oh God, I just sat down and all of a sudden they ripped!"