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Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Anna & Her Ikea Obsession (These Aren't the Droids You're Looking for)

So my "mattress" -- so-called -- is awful. After lying on it for about 5 minutes my back starts to hurt. I constantly wake up at night. I am really frustrated. Please help.

Anyway, I was on the Ikea website and they have this little friend named Anna who helps you with problems. You just type your questions or comments and she responds. Here is a picture of Anna...

"Hi, I'm Anna!"

Anyway, after venting about my mattress problems, I felt like Anna and I had forged a real connection. Here is the conversation that ensued...

-Where are you from?
- I prefer not to answer questions about my background.
- Does it make you feel uncomfortable?
- I can't discuss those sorts of feelings or emotions .
- Why?
- I wish I could give you an explanation for that, but I can't.
- Tell me everything; tell me the truth.
- I am not able to lie. Would you like to discuss Ikea?
- Oh, I see, way to steer the conversation in a different direction.
- I'm sorry, to which Ikea store do you want directions?
- Nice try. Your Jedi mind tricks won't work on me.
- I can't really express an opinion on that to be honest. Perhaps we could talk about IKEA instead.
- I love you.
-That's not really relevant to IKEA in any way. Please try and keep the conversation focused on our great company.

I can only talk about Ikea because I am a freak!