"The finest food and pants blog on the web."

Tuesday, September 3, 2019

Department of Pants

In my prior dispatch, I think I failed to clearly communicate an important theoretical model for understanding pants.  I've been so worried and have felt so incomplete, because I know my last post was sent for all the world to see, and it's horrifying to think that untold numbers read my treatise without understanding an important point.  Were these people confused?  Did they take away something completely different from what I wanted them to take away?  How can I make sure EVERY person who read my prior post can read this clarification?  Let's say many people subscribe to my posts.  Great!  They will get this update in their mailboxes.  But what if someone just happened upon the page, read the post, but does not subscribe?  He may go about his business for years not understanding what I was trying to say!  How can I find that person?  How can I find the person who read the post but is now out there in the world and will not see the clarification and will potentially go about his affairs with an incomplete understanding of what I was trying to say about pants?

One possibility is to get a list of every single human being in the world.  Then I can start calling, e-mailing, and going from place to place, asking people if they read the post from last week.  If they did, I can find out if they read my update.  If they did, great.  If not, then I can explain the clarification!  If I do this process for every single human being, assuming my list is complete, then, once complete, I can feel pretty confident that every person who read my post now has a correct understanding?  Right?