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Thursday, December 8, 2011

If It Doesn't Fit, You must Acquit

 "Man proposes and god disposes."

Recently I came to a realization: my casual, "weekend" pants fit me much better than my work pants.  How this happened is a complicated matter, which could take volumes to analyze and explain, if, indeed, an explanation is possible. Suffice it to say it is so.

This being so, I faced the following predicament: live a double life, one in which I go to work in pants that are tight or otherwise do not fit me well (generally, the problem is with the break); the other in which I relax on the weekend in pants that fit reasonably well.   It's tearing me apart and I refuse to live a lie!

Therefore, my friends - and I do hope you will consider me your friend when once you hear my solution - I resolved to do something drastic.  What is more important I ask you: looking professional and holding onto your job security, or wearing pants you can at least face in the mirror?  I chose the latter.  For the past two weeks, I have been wearing jeans and casual chinos, along with a pair of casual but still sporty sneakers, to work.

Now, please consider, I do not work in finance or at a law firm.  I do not want to tell you what I do, because I find it to be rather meaningless and therefore it embarrasses me, but let's just say I am walking a thin rope.  Every day I ask myself what would happen if my boss were to demand I take off my pants and change into something more suitable - perhaps a pair of one-size-fits-all dress trousers that they keep on-hand for apostasies such as mine.  I would refuse and demand pant justice!  Or at least I like to think so.