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Thursday, July 17, 2008

You Know You're a Hypochondriac When...

"There seem to be various shapes and various shades of gray -- Non-specific, but I think everything is fine, probably." (the report done by my radiologist)

Some people, from time to time, have referred to me as a "hypochondriac." But as I always say, you're not a hypochondriac when you really have a terminal illness.

Anyway, I was looking over a CT scan report from a little while back and I noticed the name of the radiologist. I thought to myself, hm, maybe I'll just do a Google search and see what comes back.

You see, one must always question (in a reasonable and constructive way) the medical care he or she receives. This means it is totally sound to look into the background and personal life of your physician or consulting doctor -- in this case, my radiologist -- because a person's background and personal life weigh heavily on his or her professional aptitude.

So anyway, I did a Google search and most of the stuff was pretty useless, but I did find her NY Times wedding announcement dating back to 1992.

I found some disturbing tidbits about this so-called radiologist of mine...

1) She married a lawyer.
2) She's from Long Island.

Both of these things can mean only one thing: this lady is in no way qualified to interpret my CT scan. I will need to get a new reading by someone who did not marry a lawyer and who is not from Long Island. Is that too much to ask?